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That is why it is vitally important that those who have received a diagnosis of BPD to undergo psychiatric evaluation by a board-certified psychiatrist or qualified mental health What The Four BPD Pitfalls Are And How People Slide From One Pitfall Into The Next. One of the main criteria of diagnosing Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is difficulty maintaining relationships. I am currently being treated for Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). However, if you recognize such a clear cycle, be aware they may also get worse People in an abusive BPD relationship may be under not only stress but also  Those suffering with borderline personality disorder (BPD) have a proclivity for unstable interpersonal relationships. These symptoms often result in impulsive actions and problems in relationships. He did most all of these things in the article as this cycle occurred over and over and over again. I've found it. . You live The Love / Hate Relationship for Borderlines By Kathy Broady MSW 29 Comments There are distinct differences between Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and Borderline Personality Disorder (DID). The same ‘story’ and patterns are repeated again and again in each new relationship. There's no known cause, but it's believed to be a Re: cannot get over BPD relationship :' I'm sorry in advance for this post because it's probably not what you want to hear. I could try and use all kinds of flat, clinical words to try and explain what it’s like to Borderline personality disorder, commonly known as BPD, is a mental disorder usually diagnosed in young or early adulthood and affecting between 1. If you have BPD or you live with a BPD person, you have probably observed that the borderline symptoms change as your mental and the emotional states change. Introduction Borderline Personality Disorder is a serious condition which is estimated to affect between 1-3% of the general population. But considering what a person experiencing BPD deals with daily, these labels aren’t fair. Given the behavior that I saw from this particular BPD, I would venture to say that BPDs have a tendency to contract more STDs than the rest of the population. How to end a borderline relationship? Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is characterized by contrast moods that may damage considerably relationships with family, friends, and colleagues. The added challenges of addiction and other mental illness may worsen BPD symptoms or the symptoms of the co-occurring disorder. Funny how two-dimensional letters with no depth can represent something so wild and big and chaotic. Mahari is a life coach who has designed a program for non borderlines leaving or who have left a relationship with someone with BPD and who still need to really let it go and break free from thinking about it or being affected by it. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a complex psychiatric condition that co-occurring substance abuse and other mental health disorders can intensify. If you are in a relationship with a woman with BPD, their behavior is affecting you. They change history to fit their twisted theories, thoughts and fears. Having BPD is no picnic, either. 20 The borderline personality disorder scale of the PDQ-4 19 is a 9-item, true/false, self-report measure that consists of the diagnostic criteria for borderline personality that are listed in the DSM-IV. The BPD Relationship Cycle. People with borderline personality disorder see people as all good or all bad and have extreme, blink-of-an-eye mood swings. BPD romantic relationship break-up. Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness that can cause a lot of suffering, carries a risk of suicide and needs an accurate diagnosis along with targeted treatment. . Help for Borderline Personality Disorder. People with borderline personality disorder may experience intense episodes of anger Is there treatment available for BPD? Absolutely. Also, because I have an  Willingway works with families who are in a codependent relationship with codependency issues also meet the criteria for a diagnosis of BPD. This is the point where the one person perpetrates an act of verbal, physical or emotional abuse on another. It all starts so passionately, I feel nothing but butterflies with everything they say or do to me. The shame of abandonment is an enduring self-destructive schema for those with BPD. Bpd Relationships Bpds Jumps From One Relationship To Another One. "BPD Devalue/Discard Cycle. John Gunderson, a major force in the BPD world and the person who originally defined the diagnosis, discusses Borderline Personality Disorder from the viewpoint of a researcher and clinician. Get too close and that is stressful for most with BPD. Just curious about something. This creates a vicious cycle that traps both of you in a dysfunctional and unhealthy relationship. It usually begins in your late teens or early 20s. 2nd is the "black" I hate everything about this person stage. Here’s what it’s like to be in a relationship with someone with I find myself going through cycles within a relationship. More women have it than men. The key to maintaining a relationship with someone with BPD is to find ways to cope with these cycles and to encourage your BPD partner to get professional help to reduce these cycles. Borderline Personality Disorder is a complicated condition where people have unstable relationships, rapid shifts into rage and alarm, endless nasty dramas, and cycle in their attitudes towards loved ones from “You are the greatest” to “You are slime and deserve punishment. It is painful and real on both sides of Borderline Personality Disorder. Individuals with BPD have a history of brief and intensive relationships that ended prematurely and badly. Borderline Relationship Cycle Psychopaths, borderlines, and sociopaths are experts at flattery & charm. Yet, despite being so prevalent, BPD is not commonly known about or understood. Why? In order for you to have received a diagnosis of BPD, your symptoms were probably affecting several aspects of your life, namely your relationships. Borderline personality disorder, however, fosters codependency, a situation where one person in a relationship relies on the other for the vast majority of their needs and desires. Living with borderline personality disorder, or being in a relationship with someone who has BPD, can be stressful. The Borderline Twist Defined The Borderline Twist occurs when a BPD takes an event and literally changes it. As I have BPD and even thought it's kicked my ass many times, I now find it to be one of the most  Jun 10, 2014 A romantic relationship with a person with borderline personality disorder can be challenging. When an individual with BPD is in a romantic relationship, despite their nature to engage in the relationship cycle, they become desperately attached to their partner. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness. BPD does something that triggers shame (cheats, lies etc), or they just want to leave the relationship. Sometimes partners in BPD relationships are helped by couples therapy. There is often dangerous behavior and self-harm. How to end a borderline relationship? Ending relations with a BPD individual so the non bpd just goes with it hoping and ensuring they will get showered in false love and ideology just to be caught in the bpd storm again…hence the cycle gets repeated on a more frequent time frame testing to see if you will leave and you dont so they laugh and hit you on a more lower level until you are totaly not your self and end up The main feature of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a significant pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, and emotions. These individuals are unable to tolerate being alone due to their abandonment anxiety. org and aim to provide support to those impacted by BPD by sharing knowledge and introduction to the Family Connections program. New research indicates that this Borderline personality disorder is a mental illness marked by an ongoing pattern of varying moods, self-image, and behavior. Dealing w/ Borderline Personality Disorder In Our Relationship | Q & A I wanted to share with you all how my boyfriend Brian Turner and I deal with borderline personality disorder in our I always find there are 3 stages in my relationships. People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) struggle to understand how wives, husbands, friends, and other family members experience their intense reactions, mood swings, and risky behavior. John G. Here was a woman who not only understood you but who you could truly be yourself with. Borderline personality disorder (BPD), also known as emotionally unstable personality disorder (EUPD), is a long-term pattern of abnormal behavior characterised by unstable relationships with other people, unstable sense of self and unstable emotions. However, healing also needs to happen within your relationship. If you care about someone with borderline personality disorder, keep these four facts in mind: To Help Your Family Member, You Must Help Yourself First Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is highly associated with verbal abuse, emotional abuse, psychological abuse, physical abuse, and/or domestic violence often suffered by those who are non-borderline. What can you expect? Check out BPD and  Apr 22, 2018 Letting go of borderline personality disorder (BPD) cycles of drama in So as I'm healing, I've also had to let go of some of the relationships in  Jun 13, 2018 Borderline personality disorder, or BPD, is a form of mental illness would burn out almost immediately, and then it would start a cycle of guilt and shame afterward. Thankfully the treatment is working; my general functionality, mood, and relationships are all improving. I am triggered easily when in an intimate relationship, and can quickly deteriorate from the strong capable woman I was when it began into an actively suicidal and helpless person. With this understanding of what makes the woman with traits of BPD engage in these destructive behavior patterns, let’s now turn to the question of why so many men stay even when it’s clear that the woman they are with is not capable of sustaining a healthy relationship. The disorder occurs in the context of relationships: sometimes all relationships are affected, sometimes only one. Those with borderline personality disorder, or BPD, a mental illness marked by unstable moods, often experience trouble maintaining interpersonal relationships. In order to be diagnosed with BPD, you must show signs of at least five of these symptoms. Needless to say, if you have a loved one with BPD, life can be fraught with crises and conflict. Feb 10, 2011 The BPD relationship cycle affects every aspect of life for teenage girls with Borderline Personality Disorder. Caring about someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) tosses you on a roller coaster ride from being loved and lauded to abandoned and bashed. But I don’t want to focus on the negative here. They are in a constant state of crisis. If you're going to enter into a relationship with someone with BPD, learn what you can about the illness. 1st is the "white" happy honey moon stage. As such, it is essential to choose a treatment program that offers family and couples therapy as a safe space in which you can explore the impact of BPD and reorient your relationship along a more positive axis. Thus, a relationship with a non-mentally ill person can be unhealthy, and a relationship with someone with a mental illness can be healthy. While there can be many reasons, a few common ones include; 1. Impulsive behavior may also include leaving jobs or relationships, running away, and self-injury. This negative perception is aroused and or triggered by any number of things that take borderlines emotionally back to the unmet needs and the pain that sits there until faced, felt and healed. This is the reason they demonstrate a predictable relationship cycle. An Idealization- Discard and Push-Pull Cycle- A borderline can idealize you and make you feel like a god and then in a matter of few minutes declare you the reincarnation of Satan. If you have BPD, you may initially idealize a person or situation, throwing yourself into a relationship fully and without reservation. They never relax. If you are like most men who have found themselves in a committed relationship with a woman with traits of borderline personality disorder or BPD, you probably started off feeling like you were the luckiest guy in the world. as the other half of an adult relationship. People with BPD often derive their sense of worth from how much other people are serving them, Lobel said. It's infinitely sad. I see why though…he feeds off this as well. It all comes down to how you handle conflict. The BPD can't then admit to the shameful act and break up with the non as this would enforce their shame and remove them from the position of the victim. Knowing what to look for can help you to better Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness that can cause a lot of suffering, carries a risk of suicide and needs an accurate diagnosis along with targeted treatment. The BPD relationship cycle can affect every aspect of life for teenage girls with Borderline Personality Disorder. These individuals are unable to tolerate  There is a way out of this cycle. We are affiliated with NEABPD. The main characteristic of this kind of personality disorder is that the person becomes very controlling in an attempt to avoid being rejected. Those suffering with borderline personality disorder (BPD) have a proclivity for unstable interpersonal relationships. No remorse shown although he will say he has destroyed our lives. Relationships and Borderline Personality Disorder. I have now learnt John G. DSM-IV-TR Diagnostic criteria for Personality disorders and (BPD): Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is one of the 11 Personality disorders that are classified on the DSM-IV-TR, a personality disorder is characterised by a stable pattern of inner experience and behaviour that is inflexible and pervasive, deviating markedly from the I have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Ending a Relationship. 1). org News Summary This is a safe space exclusively for people without BPD to discuss the challenges and difficulties in their current or previous relationship to someone with BPD. If she is truly BPD then she is going to cycle between periods of idealization (the "good" part of the relationship) and devaluation (the "bad" part). It is a vicious cycle and a curse. Future Health - Reform; Corporate Pharmaceutical Unit. Later, when things come down from that high, they begin the "push/pull" cycle when certain situations or events "trigger" this to happen. Being a borderline (having BPD) is no picnic, either. It was this relationship that facilitated my full acceptance of and burgeoning Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) has at its root distorted cognitive interpretations. We also serve as a safe space for nonBPDs to discuss the experience of being abused. During that "honeymoon" phase, the BPD is always on their best; being the perfect girlfriend, praising your accomplishments, compliments, etc. At least that’s how it feels from the inside looking out. They also experience severe anger and frequently undermine their significant others. Things become even more complicated if you are dating someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Breaking up a romantic relationship with BPD is troublesome. The reality is that people with Borderline Personality Disorder are still unique, creative individuals. Recovering your life after a BPD relationship can be an extremely difficult time. “Borderline It's an endless, exhausting cycle. However, soon something may occur that conflicts with this idealized view, such as a harsh comment from a supervisor, a poor grade on a paper or a fight with your partner. Andrea Karr Though BPD can impact many areas of life, relationships take the hardest hit. After ending the relationship with the BPD, I once again took a STD test, but this time to be sure that she didn't give me anything funky when we were off-again, on-again. There is treatment and usually the women [seek] treatment because of relationship problems leading to depression or maybe self-harm behaviors. Let’s just say I’ve attempted the whole dating thing more than a few times, but my relationships all seem to end the same way (I’ll give you a hint, I’m still single). The Stages of a Relationship with a Narcissist. It’s not the first time I’ve “lost it” in a relationship. They can be amazing with the right partner. Why? Do you feel like your relationship is out of control and that every move you make has the butterfly effect, provoking a hurricane minutes later? About 6 million people in America have Borderline Personality Disorder, (BPD), most of them are women. I have read where in the relationship one partner has BPD/NPD, but what  An individual with BPD has a fear of abandonment. Yes it is so hard but if I ever broke away from my BPD partner I would never come back as it is a life of suffering and waling on egg shells. The Bpd Relationship Cycle And 3 Ways To Fix It Mindcology. ” The relationship cycle typical of extreme narcissistic abuse generally follows a pattern. In Indeed, when you love someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD), it can feel as if you are walking on eggshells, never knowing what might trigger them. Instable relationships are a characteristic of Borderline Personality Disorder -- but what does an instable relationship actually look like? This article describes a common and very confusing failure pattern that evolves over time. Subsequently, they push/bait the non to react badly. This is where the con cycle A. How has BPD manifested in your romantic relationships? Dec 18, 2018 A person with BPD may also frequently form very intense emotional new relationships, which will generally not last for any length of time,  Jan 31, 2013 Additionally, the hypersensitivity that BPD causes can result in outbursts to perceived insults and can damage personal relationships and lead  Oct 29, 2018 Menstrual Cycle Effects in Borderline Personality Disorder . Their fear of abandonment, combined with feelings of emptiness and self-loathing, makes others feel like they're constantly walking on eggshells. Stage 1 – The individual with BPD begins a relationship which seems to move with rapid intensity. But, you need to be aware of the three main BPD relationship stages (there’s probably more but these 3 are the most important). This cycle repeats over and over again because, until you get treatment, you lack the  Dating with Borderline Personality Disorder: 'I Was the Girlfriend From Hell'. A cycle often begins in which people with BPD feel emotional pain, engage in impulsive behavior to relieve that pain, feel  Sep 25, 2018 The major indicators of BPD are an inability to maintain healthy relationships, intense mood swings, and impulsivity leading to risky behavior. Caring about someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD) tosses you on a roller coaster ride from being loved and lauded to abandoned and bashed. Borderline personality disorder  Dec 22, 2015 Relationships with narcissists, borderlines, histrionics, sociopaths . Brad says. If you are emotionally involved with someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder, you may be asking yourself if that person is capable of emotional intimacy, as you are probably experiencing what has been termed a “Love-Hate Relationship,” or the Push/Pull Cycle of Borderline Personality Disorder. It is a pattern of toxic relating and relationship rupture. Often I receive emails from women who have young children and don’t know how to protect their children from the BPD grandmother or BPD in-law. There are three predictable relationship stages with most narcissists, borderlines, histrionics or sociopaths: Idealize, Devalue and Discard. Why BPD relationships are so complicated. Gunderson, MD, a pioneer in the diagnosis, treatment, and research of borderline personality disorder (BPD) and professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and McLean Hospital, died at home on January 11, 2019, while surrounded by his family. The propensity for abusiveness in those with BPD is instigated by the narcissistic injury that is at the heart of the core wound of abandonment. It occurs all the time and is a big problem for the Non in the relationship with the BPD. For Symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder. And then it Healing from Borderline Personality Disorder Abuse the liar in the relationship. Begin by coming up with strategies for future confrontations, know the limitations of the abused An Australian not for profit organisation to help families affected by borderline personality disorder. Although it feels amazing at first, this idealization is actually responsible for just as much damage as the abuse itself. I continue to cycle through monogamous relationships, with the most recent lasting three years. “People with BPD are like people with third degree burns over 90% of their bodies Whether you have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or love someone who does, one of the enormous benefits we derive from recovery is improving our relationships. Furthermore, the symptoms must be long-standing (usually beginning in 23 Things People With Borderline Personality Disorder Want You To Know responded to my presentation of BPD. The seduction phase, “ego stroking”. Borderline personality disorder is often underdiagnosed or misdiagnosed. First, there is the idealization stage in which you can do no wrong. J. Hi I am struggling to get out of a BPD relationship after 30 years of struggling. Even after you have sought treatment for Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), you may find that maintaining personal relationships is a difficult task. Although I'm still mildly disappointed with the person in the grey stage for After an 18 year relationship and 16 year marriage, 35 days ago I learned my husband was having multiple affairs, one lasting ten years. It can be very difficult to acknowledge and accept the reality of BPD, but treatment may help. Does Maladaptive Coping Mediate the Relationship Between Borderline  Dec 10, 2015 BPD can make it really hard to maintain relationships. By the time someone with BPD reaches adulthood, the pattern is pretty well set. Borderline Personality Disorder, though complex, can be simplified, in the realm of the push/ pull reality when intimacy is attempted, by saying that a borderline (active throes of BPD - not yet done some healing) is incapable of adult (emotional) intimacy because the very nature of the disorder is such that they have not emotionally matured to The black hole of BPD affects both borderlines and non-borderlines. Borderline Personality Disorder splitting can destroy your relationship by inflicting pain on the partner. Gunderson, MD. Loving someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a roller coaster ride expect a stormy relationship that includes accusations and anger, jealousy ,  Jun 13, 2019 Borderline personality disorder and relationships can be a has BPD, you can find ways to cope with the cycles of emotions that the condition  Nov 6, 2018 Borderline personality disorder embodies a most poignant paradox: Sufferers yearn for Her relationship with Eduardo started on the A train. You may have a borderline personality disorder relationship cycle happening with your partner. We used 2 measures for the assessment of BPD—the borderline personality scale of the PDQ-4 19 and the SHI. While the beginnings of a relationship with someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder might take you to the greatest euphoric heights imaginable, it can also take you to the lowest lows. There is no single test to diagnose BPD. Then they feel engulfed and like they are being controlled - feelings from the past and often not here-and-now truth unless with Do you know the things you should do or the things you should say to someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD)?If not, join the millions of family, friends, and/or coworkers who don’t. It is a useful label when properly applied, but has become so ubiquitous as to have lost some The cycle feeds on itself because the more people drift away because of your “weird” emotions and behavior, the “weirder” your emotions and behavior become in the presence of people you like and are afraid to lose. Some borderline individuals are suicidal and self-harm. Helping Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder How to Recognize BPD in a Loved One and Improve Your Relationship Does someone close to you suffer from borderline personality disorder (BPD)? If so, you already know that BPD not only affects those with the diagnosis—it affects everyone who cares about them. This is how people (even mental health professionals) describe those who live with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). 9 percent of Americans, according to Psych Central. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is defined by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-IV as a pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships in an individual’s life, along with an unstable self-image, affect, and increased impulsivity starting in early adulthood. Bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder share some overlapping symptoms, but the two mental health conditions are actually very different Once a sleep cycle is thrown off schedule In my Part I post of November 4, I described how a lot of the difficult behavior of patients with borderline personality disorder (BPD) in their intimate relationships is designed to elicit in the Having a relationship with a person with BPD is often characterized as a "love-hate" relationship, where one minute your loved one is needy, and the next moment he/she is pushing you away. I love and care about him yes but I am not happy or living the life I would like to live. Remain some time alone and think carefully about your future actions. Ones that ultimately destroy my relationship, relationships with people who are genuinely good for me but can't handle my BPD. The borderline may mirror their new partner, they could concur with most anything the new partner expresses and even tell the new partner they are into the same things that they are into, sometimes even tak Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) has become something of the flavor of the week in recent years. Is the Borderline splitting destroying your relationship? BPD splitting ruins relationships since the person can misconstrue the behaviours of others when their feelings are brought up in the relationship. In my coaching practice, I'd say difficulties with relationships are the number one reason why folks voluntarily seek counsel and guidance. 10 ways to identify a person with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)- 1. A score ≥ 5 is highly Once the narcissistic cycle of abuse is understood, the abused can escape the cycle at any point. In many cases, the individual with BPD is aware of this cycle and of  Jul 11, 2017 For others, this pattern regularly manifests when in a relationship with a person diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). The bulk of emails that I receive inquire about how to deal with a Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) relationship whether a parent, spouse, or sibling. Borderline personality disorder (BPD), also known as emotionally unstable personality disorder . Borderline personality disorder (BPD) manifests in many different ways, but for the purposes of diagnosis, mental health professionals group the symptoms into nine major categories. Whether you are a male or female with borderline personality disorder or BPD traits dealing with the heartache of a romantic breakup, it’s important to have compassion for the fact that you face additional challenges compared with a young adult who does not experience the exquisite level of emotional sensitivity with which you are so familiar. There are four distinct phases: Flashpoint Phase. Individuals in emotionally abusive relationships experience a dizzying whirlwind that includes three When BPD Makes You Cycle Through Relationships | The Mighty. A Borderline’s Emotional Reaction Cycle Christine Hammond, MS, LMHC Christine is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor by the State of Florida with over fifteen years of experience in counseling Welcome to my life with borderline personality disorder (BPD). Neurobiologically, there are a host of brain systems, regions, neuropathways, and chemistry that hinder emotions and cognition. Borderline personality disorder people have a strong fear of abandonment and rejection. Perception Fuels the Cycle of Rejection and Hostility in Borderline Personality January 31, 2013 • By A GoodTherapy. It can break the mental stability of the person leading to desperation and pondering over suicide. The Abuse Cycle is a repeating pattern where both the perpetrator and the victim of abuse contribute to the conditions which perpetuate the cycle. It is commonly misdiagnosed or missed altogether as some of the symptoms can mirror other disorders, and BPD often coexists with another Emotionally Abusive Relationships often are with a person who has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). People who live in a relationship with a person who suffers from borderline perso In many relationships, this type of mentality forces the termination of the relationship due to the inability of the BPD sufferer to let go of the past. Home · Conditions & Treatments · B · Borderline personality disorder. Jul 26, 2019 If you are considering starting a relationship with someone with BPD, or are in one now, you need to educate yourself about the disorder and  Jul 11, 2018 BPD sufferers experience a cycle of behavior in their romantic relationships. There is a propensity toward negative perception. June 12, 2014 at 8: 44  Oct 1, 2017 Have you even been in relationship, familial or romantic, in which you've Borderline Personality Disorder is said to affect approximately 6% of the This can give rise to an endless cycle of abuse that due to the bond, your . Eleanor Payson describes this extremely well in The Wizard of Oz and other Narcissists. 3rd is when I'm over the person, my "grey" stage if you will. 6 and 5. You live in unbearable psychic pain most of the time and in severe cases on the border Are You Trapped in a Relationship with Someone Suffering From BPD? Borderline Personality Disorder can be the elephant in the room that few can identify and no one wants to talk about. As if life doesn’t hand them enough pain, they extend and expand that pain with their attempts to avoid the pain instead of work through it. Learn What You Can About Borderline Personality Disorder. After all, I like to be jolly and keep things upbeat. But by reframing emotional manipulation in BPD, you can come to understand what truly drives your loved one’s behavior and how to help them heal. Overview Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness that centers on the inability to manage emotions effectively. Use these strategies to break the  Oct 13, 2017 The behavior of people with borderline personality disorder is often borderline personality disorder targets relationships specifically, making them the The cycles of clinginess and rejection, adulation and vilification can be  Jun 29, 2017 A woman with borderline personality disorder writes about the cycle of This time I'll be able to hold down a stable relationship, I tell myself. A successful first date can lead the individual with BPD into a state of seeing their partner in a perfect and picturesque way. bpd relationship cycle

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